What must we be as women? Strong, but delicate. Caring but powerful. Elegant but able to hold our own against men. It’s a life of contradiction, of mystery. Once upon a time it was easy to define what a woman must be, through the ‘50’s a woman had a set role, not that many liked it, but it was a definite role none-the-less. Today? Who knows?

As far as I can tell, we must keep a house, raise a family, have a career, break the glass ceiling, be competent in more or less everything we lay our hands on. No wonder we’re so confused.

Are there studies on this? Yes. Are they helping? No. Simply life no longer has a structure. For millennia there were set gender roles, even as far back as hunter gatherer societies. And they made sense for most the part (can anyone see how little credence I give the feminist movement?), we are supposed to have children and raise them…we can’t delegate that one to men no matter how much we’d like to. Infant bonds have to form and really it has to be with a parent, usually a mother, within the first 6 months of life...those 6 month gaps aren't conducive to careers.

As much as the thought doesn’t thrill me, I can see an eventual need to return to old ways of doing things. I’m not sure how this will happen, or indeed when, but the urgency for women to be everything seems to need to find its end, having children really does get in the way of a career…but not having them gets in the way of the self-preservation of the human species which seems mildly more important.

Something about this realisation doesn’t sit comfortably with me, I believe too strongly in education and having something to strive for. Being at home constantly drives me insane, and frankly so do children. While I concede that there seems to be a certain inevitability to this end, I really don’t think I like it.

No wonder I'm confused.

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I have moments where creativity escapes, but periods in which brain goes into overdrive about life, the universe and everything instead. I have entire folders on my computer full of ideas that could be the basis for a thesis but which I doubt will ever see more than the inside of my hard-drive.

I'm not sure how many others have these moments but I was curious none-the-less. I may just end up throwing my own ideas around ultimately but I have no problem with that either.

updated Jun 20 '11 by Ilyaila