Harlot

5

a femme from Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada

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"Truth is stranger than fiction--as fiction has to make sense. Any time the world starts to make sense, understand you are merely apply a temporary fiction." -- myself

My name is Katrina "the Lamia" Payne. Also know as "the Harlot", or just "Harlot". Catalina is the formal of Katrina--though it is often just shortened to "Kat", "Kate", "Kitty", "Trouble" or "Heroin Pussy" (uh... heh...)

Completed Involvements

  • Pokemon Sepia: Team Temporal: War of Origins (Collab Epic)

Discontinued Involvements
Most of these stories either are not continuing due to lack of collaboration, or me just going all rage quit on them

  • Fantaizma X (Dead Collab)
  • SPC 2010 (Rage Quited Challenge)
  • The Last Vampires (Dead Collab)
  • Pokemon: Crescent Moon (Dead Collab)
  • Koshen Travels (Dead Collab--author's account is missing)
  • Kid Radd: Legends (Solo)

My delusions

Eh... have to update this I guess? Sometime later

Random complete and total lies about me

Now other profiles have some random truths about the people on the profile. Most of it is just them blowing their own horn. Figured I'd change this up, and present several fictional statements about me.

  • A few years ago, I looked at a girl the wrong way. Some guy who was just nearby decided to take things into his own hands. So he punched me seven times in the face. As I stood there, taking his best punches he could give.
  • I have been known to threaten girls at the local women's shelters.
  • I am always right. Just stop bothering to fight me, you cannot possibly win with logic. Just stop without even trying. I am always right--it is obviously not worth the effort.
  • I am not banned from the Edmonton YMCA.
  • I just adore special treatment. In fact, singling me out, for some reward that I do not deserve, or need, is something that I desire to seek out. I mean, I cannot imagine anything better that I would love.
  • My thought patterns are completely human.
  • I can use Windows just fine
  • I spent two weeks selling my body to furries for food and clothing.
  • I like to think I am all that, better than you. I mean, the whole queen ego thing. Everything I say and do, appears to indicate that I know I am better than you.
  • Apparently, I hate the gays. I keep getting told this. This in amongst statements that I am very transphobic as well--and that I apparently hate men.
  • Apparently, if you were born in 1992, one of the first images you were subjected to was me reacting poorly to drinking milk and making a slight mess. As I have been told by various people that they witnessed an event in 1992 that typically they were not born yet to see, or they were so ridiculously young, that I need to question how they saw it. Why could I have not gotten a cool miracle? No, I just got a bunch of kids to see me being lactose intolerant. I hate you world wide clairvoyance.
  • I have a nice and trouble free past. From a fine family.
  • I am treaty status Cree First Nations.
  • I'm a super rape machine that will not be satisfied until I've raped like seven women
  • My super muscular arms will hold the women down
  • I turn into a dragon when I get overly excited or angry
  • I was totally going to kick in the office door at the Vivian transition housing building
  • That is facial hair, not really bad acne
  • I know $$^* all about computers
  • I'm not a lesbian
  • I'm really a guy

Written Works I Enjoy

  • Catch-22 by Joseph Heller
  • Stranger in a Stangeland by Robert Heinlein
  • Neuromancer by William Gibson
  • Various Lovecraftian works
  • Francis E. Dec (YOUR ONLY HOPE FOR THE FUTURE!)
  • Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson
  • Far Side by Gary Larson
  • Hamlet by Shakespeare
  • [censored] by Shakespeare
  • The Crucible by Arthur Miller
  • Death of a Salesman by Arthur Miller
  • 1984 by George Orwell
  • Animal Farm by George Orwell
  • Various works by Isaac Asimov
  • Count Zero by William Gibson
  • Principia Discordia or How I Found the Goddess Herself and What I Did To Her When I Found Her: by Mal-2
  • The Erisana
  • The Cathedral and the Bazaar by Eric S. Raymond
  • Reinventing Comics by Scott McCloud
  • Pokemon Adventures
  • Scott Pilgrim (series)

Favourite Movies

  • Full Metal Jacket
  • A Clockwork Orange
  • Doctor Strangelove: Or How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love The Bomb
  • The Producers
  • Equilibrium
  • Blazing Saddles
  • Blues Brothers
  • Watchmen
  • Blade Runner
  • V for Vendetta
  • 300
  • Corpse Bride
  • Nightmare Before Christmas
  • Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow
  • Big Trouble in Little China
  • M*A*S*H
  • American History X
  • Kill Bill
  • Ghostbusters I and II
  • Ella Enchanted
  • The Labyrinth
  • The Addams Family
  • The Addams Family Values
  • Batman
  • Batman Returns
  • Transformers (1986)
  • Ever After (A Cinderella Story)
  • The Hellraiser series

As you can see, Tim Burton, Mel Brooks and Stanley Kubrick make up the major of Directors of my favourite movies.

Favourite Music

I view music as a background noise, mostly. However, give me time, and I will list some bands above others I enjoy.


Favourite Video Games

  • Megaman Battle Network (series, esp 3)
  • Megaman 10
  • Megaman Starforce (series, esp 3)
  • Pokemon (series)
  • Pokemon Rangers (series, esp Shadows of Almia and Guardian Signs)
  • Personna
  • Enchanted Arms
  • Mother 3
  • Fire Emblem (series)
  • Zone of the Enders: Fist of Mars
  • Star Fox (series, esp Command Mission, Assault and 64)
  • Mystery Dungeon: Shiren the Wanderer
  • Ghostbusters (Wii)
  • Monkey Island (series, esp 3, tales)
  • Advance Wars
  • Dragon Quest (series: especially IX)
  • Chrono Trigger/Chrono Cross
  • Dragon Quest Monsters: Joker
  • Monster Rancher Advance
  • X-Com (and its expansion pack sequal, Terror of the Deep).
  • X of Mana (series, esp: Legend)
  • Tetanus on Drugs
  • Custom Robo Arena
  • Virtual On
  • Dynasty Warriors: Gundam
  • Megaman X: Command Mission
  • Megaman Zero Collection
  • Paper Mario (series)
  • Castlevania Dawn of Sorrows
  • Disgaea
  • Monkey Island (series, esp Tales)
  • Full Throttle
  • Sam and Max (series)

Favourite Television Shows

  • Mythbusters
  • Red vs. Blue
  • Star Trek Voyager
  • Firefly
  • Doctor Who
  • Toppa Tengen Gurren Lagann
  • Ryussei no Rockman
  • Rockman.EXE Beasto
  • Mike and Molly
  • House MD
  • Metalocolypse
  • Freakazoid
  • Gargoyles
  • TMNT 2007
  • Animaniacs
  • Pinky and the Brain
  • Andromeda
  • Supernatural
  • Death Comes To Town
  • The Whitest Kids You Know
  • Orange is the new Black
  • American Horror Story
  • Big Bang Theory
  • Psycho-pass
  • Ghost in a Shell
  • Archer
  • Frisky Dingo
  • Adventure Time
  • Daria
  • Earthworm Jim

Redundant Misc. Random Pot Pourei of Needless Repetitive Information

Well, I am a young Canadian, who has is currently working to expand her knowledge on English, Japanese, Mandarin, German, Spanish, Chinese Traditional, ASL, Cree, Dene, Ojibwa and Sanskrit.

I am effectively fluent in none of these as a result.

Which qualifies me as Prime Minister of Canada (that is, being able to speak without being fluent in any known language. I mean, that is what got Jean Cretein into power).

I generally enjoy philosophy, folklore and mythology. All while see humour as my best trait--which has existed mostly as a coping mechanism.

I've also REALLY started to get into being a bit of a gore hound

Goals in Life

I will take over the entire Solar System

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